The way we say goodbye to the ones we love is timeless, holy, and very human. A lot of people feel that they need to kiss the dying person’s forehead at that last minute. This kind of act is a means to convey love, a last gift of connection, and a method to help the heart start to heal.
But in the last few weeks, this close gesture has led to a heated online debate when a viral video asked a scary question: Could kissing a dead person be bad for your health?
The video was filmed by Dr. Viktor Ivanovik, a Moldovan doctor who has a lot of followers on TikTok because he mixes medical advice with empathy and real life. Dr. Ivanovik warned people not to kiss the dead in this message, especially if the person died from an infectious disease. He claimed that there is a little potential of transmission after death because some germs and viruses can still be there.
His warning made a lot of people feel different things. Some folks loved how the show was honest regarding health and safety. Some others thought it was too formal and cold, and they said the doctor was disrespecting a cherished tradition that originated from sorrow and love.
But the program isn’t only about science or tradition. It’s about finding your way through the difficult crossroads of grief and medicine.
Saying Goodbye in Person is part of the Global Grieving Practice.
In many cultures around the world, touching the body of the dead person is an important part of the grieving process. These times provide you closure, comfort, and a last act of love that words can’t always give you. They can be as basic as holding someone’s hand, kissing their forehead, or putting your hand on their still chest.
This gesture says that you were important. I’m here. I’ll bring you with me.
These occasions usually happen at viewings, wakes, or family gatherings before the burial or cremation. Touch helps loved ones feel more connected in that calm space and begins the long, hard process of letting go.
But sometimes caution has to come before love, especially when there are health problems in the community.
When Public Health Guidelines Come Into Play: The COVID-19 epidemic changed a lot about how we mourn. Things that used to be seen as personal methods to show you care, including hugging at funerals, standing close together, and touching the corpse, are now seen as health dangers. Health groups told people to stay away from each other as much as possible. Masks took the role of hugs. Thanks to glass, screens, or rules, goodbyes got quieter and farther away.
Even if a lot of these restrictions have since been eased, they initiated a conversation that is still essential today: When should we be mindful when we say goodbye? How can we meet both our emotional and physical demands at the same time?
Is it dangerous to kiss someone who has died? What the Pros Say
People usually think that the risk of getting sick from a dead person is low, especially if they died from a disease that isn’t contagious, such cancer, heart failure, or old age.
But there are some big exceptions, such when touching someone right away could be deadly, even after they die. If the person who died had one of the following, medical and funeral experts warn to be careful:
TB (tuberculosis)
Hepatitis B or C
Ebola and other viral hemorrhagic fevers
Meningococcal illness and other bad bacterial disorders
Several varieties of the flu and complications from COVID-19 are respiratory infections that spread easily.
Sometimes, the body can still carry germs that can live outside of it for a long. It is not normal for someone to get sick from touching a dead body, but it can happen.
So, Dr. Ivanovik’s message is meant to make people more aware, not scare them.
Please ask an expert if you are unsure.
Every situation is unique. Experts say that the best thing to do is to talk to a doctor or qualified funeral director, especially if you don’t know what caused the death.
Funeral homes and mortuary professionals know how to handle and prepare bodies in a way that keeps people safe. They might tell families what forms of contact are safe and when they need take extra precautions, such wearing gloves, masks, or not contacting each other.
This suggestion doesn’t have to make saying goodbye less emotional. It only makes sure that the goodbye is safe and respectful.
Here are several safe and meaningful ways to say goodbye without kissing.
There are still nice and real ways to say goodbye even if you can’t touch someone. These rituals may not be what most people perform, but they can still mean a lot and show love:
🕯️ Light a candle and spend a few minutes in tranquility thinking. Put a flower in the person’s hands or next to them. Write them a note expressing your feelings, regrets, and love, and give it to them. Play their favorite song by yourself or during a memorial service. At home, make a tribute using pictures, candles, and other things that are meaningful.
These small actions help replace the emotional void that comes with not being able to touch someone. They say, “I remember.” I have respect. I let go with love.
Saying farewell and grieving are both things that are personal.
This conversation isn’t simply about germs. It’s about how we show affection and say goodbye when someone we love dies.
Touch heals a lot of individuals. It’s not only a sign to kiss a parent, lover, or child goodbye; it’s something that needs to be done. But some people could find peace in different ways, or they might wish to be alone while they grieve.
It doesn’t matter if you kiss the forehead or light a candle.
What matters is why you did it.
Finding Kindness in the Middle Ground
It’s normal to be confused between your heart and your head. But you don’t have to be two separate people to be compassionate and aware.
Don’t judge the choices of a friend or family member who is grieving if you’re assisting them. If you’re the one who’s grieving, remember that there is no “right” way to say goodbye; only what feels right to you.
And if you have to adjust your routines due of health problems, remember that not blowing kisses doesn’t mean you don’t love someone.
Goodbyes are safe, and grief is smart.
Even when health is at stake, Dr. Ivanovik’s movie reminds us that love needs limitations. But it also reminds us to find new ways to be there, show respect, and keep in touch when it matters most.
The affection, memories, and bond stay the same whether you touch a hand, kiss a forehead, or say a prayer from a distance.
When you say goodbye, don’t be scared; be elegant.
And don’t forget that even the tiniest act of kindness is enough if you do it with love.