A State Police officer is stationed on the side of the highway in his cruiser with a radar gun in his hand, waiting for the next automobile to go too fast. But instead of a flurry of tires and tail lights, he sees something strange: a car that is barely driving 22 miles per hour. He raises an eyebrow and thinks, “That’s just as dangerous as someone going 90.” He switches on his lights and stops the slow-moving car because he wants to have a closer look.
He sees five old women inside the car when he gets closer. There are two people in the front seats and three in the back. Their faces are pale as ghosts, and they are all sitting still with their eyes wide open. The motorist, who is clearly agitated but attempting to stay calm, looks up at the officer and says, “Officer, I don’t get it.” I was going the speed limit! What seems to be wrong?
The officer tries to sound professional when he says, “Ma’am, you weren’t speeding, but driving well below the speed limit can also be very dangerous for everyone on the road.”
“Slower than the speed limit?” she asks. because she is not sure. No, sir, I was going precisely what the sign said: 22 miles per hour.
The cop takes a minute to think about what happened, and suddenly he gets it. He laughs a little and replies, “That wasn’t the speed limit, ma’am; that was the route number.” You are on Route 22.
Her cheeks flush red with embarrassment as she chuckles. “Oh my,” she says, “I guess that makes more sense.” She thanks the officer for telling her about the mistake and says she will drive properly from now on.
The officer looks in the car one last time before letting them go and adds, “Ma’am, one more thing.” Is everyone all right in here? Your passengers seem like they’ve seen a ghost.
The motorist says, “Oh, don’t worry about them, officer,” still smiling. We just left Route 119.
The officer shakes his head, waves them off, and laughs as he walks back to his cruiser. The best stories emerge from the places you least expect them to.
You didn’t see this last funny story coming.
Johnny goes to a general store to look for work. He walks up to the owner and says, “Are you hiring?” I need work.
The owner looks him over and asks, “Do you think you’re a good sales person?”
Johnny shrugs. “I think so. I suppose I might be.
The owner nods and says, “Okay.” Look at me. “You can have the job if you think you can do what I do.”
A man comes in a few minutes later and says he wants to buy a bag of grass seed. The owner comes over, takes up the seed, and says, “Of course.” But if you’re planting grass, you’ll probably need a lawnmower soon. You want one of those?
The customer thinks for a bit and then nods. “Yes, really. That’s a good thing to think.
Boom! The seed and the mower are no longer there. The customer is happy when they go.
“Do you see that?” the owner asks Johnny. He came in for one thing, but I sold him something else that he didn’t even know he needed. Do you believe you can do that?
Johnny is happy. “Of course.”
A second customer comes in not long after that. The owner steps back and lets Johnny take the stage.
“Can I help you today?” Johnny asks as he approaches over.
The customer says, “Yes, I want to buy my wife a box of Tampax.”
Johnny grabs a box right away and asks, “Do you want a lawnmower with that?”
It seems like the customer doesn’t get it. “A lawn mower?”
Johnny shrugs and says, “You might as well mow the lawn because you won’t be doing much else for the next seven days!”
Old school.
I hope that made you laugh today. Have a nice time!