Lily Allen has never been shy about what she says, and her latest comment may be one of the most controversial yet—not because of what she said, but because of how openly she said it.
The 40-year-old singer said something on a recent episode of her podcast Miss Me? that many celebs would never say out loud. She co-hosts the show with her close friend and broadcaster Miquita Oliver. When Allen talked about abortion, he said, “I’ve had a few.” But I can’t remember the exact number… I’d like to say four or five.
The comment was quite honest, frank, and almost shocking. Oliver promptly said that she had “about five” of her own. There was no long pause or awkward silence. A brief moment of honest, unplanned honesty between two women who have known one other for decades. And just like that, they started a topic that most people, especially renowned people, want to avoid or clean up.
As expected, the response online was immediate and fairly split. People complimented Allen for being honest about a topic that is still incredibly taboo, even in countries where abortion is legal. Fans and individuals who support reproductive rights liked how honest she was, saying it was a bold way to say no to the stigma that sometimes comes with abortion. Others, on the other hand, were quick to criticize her, saying she was ignoring a big issue. They believed the tone was too casual and rude, as if she thought abortion was a little concern.
But Allen, who was known for being quick-witted and not fitting in, recognized how her words may be received. She really seemed ready for the answer. She remembered that the man who paid for her abortion had done so at one point during the play. At the time, she felt it was a sweet thing to do. Now, she thinks about it in a very different way. She said, “I don’t think it’s nice or romantic.” “He didn’t even respond to me after.”
It’s a small but harsh indictment, not just of one man’s lack of concern, but also of how women are often left to deal with the emotional, physical, and social effects of their reproductive choices on their own. The key point of Allen’s comments is independence, which the story brings up. You have the right to make a choice, own it, talk about it, and deal with it as you want, without having to feel guilty, unhappy, or regretful.
This is especially clear when she talks about how people talk about abortion in public, even those who agree with it. She says, “I really don’t like it.” “I’ve seen memes from accounts that favor abortion that say things like, “My aunt had a disabled child,” or “She would have died if she had gone full term.” Like, shut up! Simply state, “I don’t want a baby right now.” That gives you enough reason.
This comment is quite powerful; it’s honest, direct, and will make you think. But at its core, it reflects a greater annoyance with the idea that women have to explain their abortions in terms of bad or extreme situations. The main point is that your option isn’t valid until you’re about to die or are in serious medical trouble. Allen says that real choice doesn’t have to come from trauma. You should desire to be in charge of your life and your body.
Some people claimed that her tone was a problem since it was too casual, lighthearted, and even giggly at times. Several others were upset and even insulted by the way it was said so casually. Others, on the other hand, thought the tone was an important change from the story we’ve seen before: the picture of the sorrowful woman, full of regret, quietly mourning a choice that was necessary but hard.
Alison Wilson, a researcher who wrote about the podcast in Metro, said, “Think about how much better this would be if Allen had talked about how bad she feels and how sorry she is.” This has to do with accepting things on a case-by-case basis. People in society are usually only okay with abortion stories if they also make people feel bad. People feel uncomfortable when women don’t do that humiliation. It’s not because they’re wrong, but because they break a rule we’ve always followed.
Allen’s report doesn’t have a strong story line. She doesn’t seem to be looking for forgiveness or to make up for what she did. She doesn’t want to be a role model or speak up for a cause. She is only telling the truth about how she lived. She has the right to talk about her reproductive history, her feelings, and her memories, but not to inspire or incite.
It’s also vital to remember that Allen’s decision to be so honest is quite important in the big picture of her public life. She is a mother of two. She has had to deal with miscarriages, public breakdowns, and the attention of the tabloids. She now lives a quiet life, primarily away from the public eye. She goes against both celebrity culture and traditional femininity by being prepared to speak her mind, even if it could get her in trouble.
No, she is not “promoting abortion.” She isn’t making it sound good. She isn’t making a political statement or telling people to do what she does. She’s taking charge of her own story in a world where women are still urged to keep silent about the choices they make that influence their lives.
Lily Allen’s opinions aren’t awful; they just don’t follow the rules for how women should talk about reproductive rights. They don’t come with any cautions. They don’t have to ask for permission. And for many people, that’s the kind of honesty that reproductive freedom should let people have. Not only do you have the freedom to choose, but you also have the right to communicate about your choice clearly, without feeling bad, humiliated, or having to change the truth to make it easier for others to accept.