Many couples feel only happiness as they prepare for marriage, but the costs of a wedding can quickly sour their feelings.
His daughter had set certain wedding standards and a dad recently shared on Reddit how hard it was for him to face this issue.
His post on Reddit’s AITA (Am I The A*****e) discussed that his promise to cover the wedding costs for his daughter is part of the usual way parents show their support as their children get married in New York.
Even so, the father was surprised when he discovered how much was actually involved in fulfilling his daughter’s weddingday plans.
Different from what most people expect, the bride-to-be wanted her wedding to be a grand destination wedding in New Zealand, attended by about 100 to 200 friends and family.
On top of all this, the price would be a huge $200,000. After learning this, the father was uncertain about whether to help his daughter because he feared that her costly tastes would separate him from his daughters and turned his money into flames.
The father wrote to me, describing his confusion by saying “My wife encourages me, since we can afford it, but I think it would be too extravagant.” Mom and Pop both seem to have stopped talking to me. It made me ask if I should go ahead and spend a lot of money and possibly hurt the feelings of my relatives for the sake of my daughter’s wedding.
Many on Reddit expressed their views and one user said: “If the bride can’t afford a destination wedding herself, she should not have one. It might sound bad, but it really is true. To add, the flights, the hotels and the various costs take a lot more money than usual. Who will are paying for the tickets: both of you or just her? Oh and her soon-to-be husband’s ticket.”
They figured: since she’s in a bad mood and hasn’t said a word to you lately, that means she doesn’t deserve it. I feel that our parents are not obligated to give us their money. I believe any inheritance I get from my dad is not guaranteed.
Many Redditors suggested that the father could give what he was comfortable giving so the child could arrange the wedding within that means.
Decide on a maximum amount of $ and hand the budget over to her. Inform her of anything else a quote includes, but it remains the responsibility of the couple. Ensure you mention any travel needs for the bride and groom as well as family members. If having a big wedding is what she wants, she can hire professional help and pay for it.”
Up until now, all the father has noted is that his daughter is calling him a jerk and has stopped talking to him. How ungrateful!
It shows how parents have to be careful to give enough, but not overdo it.