“The moment I found out it wasn’t just pain; it was cancer.”
I thought I just had a discomfort in my thigh at first. I thought the discomfort was just a problem with my pregnancy, like a pinched nerve or sciatica. But the pain got worse and worse. After my daughter Liora was born, I tried to get through it. I wanted to savor every little thing about her, including the sweet smell of a baby, the way her tiny fingers felt around mine, and the delight of cuddling with her at night. But the pain kept getting worse. One morning, I couldn’t even rock her to sleep.
That’s when I finally got the scans done. I’ll never forget how the doctor looked. Before the doctor said anything, the way he looked at me made me feel like something bad was about to happen. The scans showed that the person had a rare and aggressive form of soft tissue cancer. Right away, I thought, “I just had a baby.” I don’t have time for cancer.
The Fight Begins
The chemotherapy started right soon. My milk dried up, and most nights I had to give Liora to my mom because I kept throwing up. It was much worse that the tumor spread to my femur. The doctors told me that the best way for me to live was to take off my arm. I signed the papers without crying because I didn’t want to let pity control me.
“I woke up with one leg and a lot of guilt, but I was still alive.”
I woke up with one leg and a lot of guilt. I couldn’t touch my kid, chase her when she started to crawl, or wear the dress I bought for her naming ceremony. But I kept reminding myself that I was still here. That needs to be enough.
A New Scare
Three weeks after surgery, I was getting used to therapy and crutches when I found something in my medical file that stunned me: a note about a “suspicious lesion in the right lung.” My heart raced. Was the cancer getting worse? Why didn’t anyone inform me?
“Not being able to sleep because I was scared of the unknown and had to take care of my baby.”
I tried to call my oncologist, but the office was closed. That week was awful. I had to pretend to be “okay” for my mom, latch on to Liora’s smiles for strength, and I couldn’t sleep. When it was time for my appointment, I saw my doctor. He stated he didn’t want to scare me until he knew more. They told them to get another scan, and there was a risk of a biopsy.
Power in People You Don’t Know
While I waited for the results, I worked hard on my physical therapy. That’s when I met Saoirse, who had lost her leg in a car accident. I absolutely needed her strong, calm presence. She taught me little tricks for staying balanced, how to deal with phantom pain, and that life goes on after loss. Her story about raising her son alone gave me hope. She told me to “keep your heart open,” and that’s what remained with me. You will surprise people, and they will surprise you.
“Getting back on your feet and finding strength in what another survivor has to say.”
The Results
On the day of the scan, my mom drove me alone. I told her I wasn’t sure I could go through another round of chemotherapy. She held my hand and murmured softly, “No matter what, we’ll get through this process together.”
My doctor eventually told me the news after what felt like forever: the tumor on my lung was not malignant. It wasn’t getting any worse. I couldn’t stop crying, and I was half-laughing the whole time. It felt like something I had been waiting for for months had happened.
“I was waiting for answers, and my future depended on a single scan.”
Getting Life Back
After that, I worked on getting better and beginning afresh. With each stride I made with my prosthetic limb, it seemed like I was getting back a part of myself. I learnt how to stretch to ease phantom pain, massage my stump before bed, and most importantly, stand up and hold Liora in my arms again. That one moment made all the trouble worth it.
We even had an impromptu “victory party.” My mom cooked a vanilla cake with pink frosting, and my close friends donated flowers and balloons. We raised our glasses—mostly with lemonade—to love, survival, and determination. The celebration wasn’t too big, but it was just right.
“A quiet toast to strength, survival, and the small things that make life good.”
A Lesson in How to Stay Strong
When I put Liora to bed that night, I found out that she didn’t care about my scars, my prosthetic, or the fact that I got tired more easily than I used to. She just wanted me, her mother. And that was all it took.
We don’t have the choice to choose our battles in life. But it does let us choose how to cope with them. Some days, I simply wanted to curl up and cry till I was gone. But then I’d look at Liora and remember why I had to keep going.
One thing I’ve learnt from this trip is that things may change quickly. We might lose parts of ourselves, like our health, our peace, or even a limb, but we are stronger than we realize. Friends, family, and even strangers can help us keep going. Love, hope, and strength will always be stronger than fear.
“Love and strength, not scars and struggles, are what make me who I am.”
Thank you for taking the time to read my story. If it touched you, please send it to someone who might need hope today. We can remind each other that even when life becomes wild, there is always a reason to keep going.