One month ago, Autumn Brooke Bushman was an active, brave and beloved girl of 10 years old who was known by her family and friends. She brightened each room she went in with her smile, her love of dance and cheer, and her strong spirit of kindness.
However on March 21, the Bushman family of Roanoke, Virginia was overcome by an unthinkable loss. Autumn died at home – a heartbreaking farewell that her family thinks was caused by several months of unresolved bullying at her school.
Autumn was a fourth-graded student at Mountain View Elementary. At the beginning of this school year, she demonstrated the strength of character far beyond her years in defending her fellow students who were being bullied.
Her mother, Summer Bushman, told local news station WDBJ that she was the kind of person who would never allow somebody to be picked on without commenting. However, rather than praise Autumn due to her courage, she became a target as well.
According to her parents, the bullying got worse. They knew about some of them, but they think that the full picture became apparent only after it was too late.
The weeks before her death Autumn started to change. Her previously colorful closet became gloomy. she smiled no more. She played less; she spent more time by herself. The signs were there, but they were subtle and now they are heavy in the hearts of her parents.
Her father, Mark Bushman, said, “There were no signs that I could think something was really wrong. But looking back it did appear to take the shine off her.
There is one moment that she specifically remembers in front of her mother. Summer said, “A couple of weeks ago she came to me crying.” She said to me, Mom, I am so stressed out. I am being shyed. May I pretty please stay home tomorrow out of school?
Bushmans claim to have complained to school authorities who promised that the matter was under control. But now they are asking themselves whether they did enough.
“We leave our kids in the hands of schools daily,” Mark said. “But are they so carefully monitoring? Do they intervene when something is not right?”
The death of autumn shook Roanoke and the surroundings. Her story has led to emotional discussions of bullying, youth mental health and the awareness that needs to occur in schools and homes.
The local school district, in its turn, stated it is thoroughly reviewing the circumstances of the death of Autumn. They made a point in their official announcement that they would give importance to any report of a conflict among students.
However, to the loved ones of Autumn, the agony does not fade. Summer made the comment, “It is too little, too late.”
Later in March, at the funeral of Autumn, which was open to the community, her family member told stories and shared tears and hopes that things might change. Her father went on social media with the following message demanding unity and responsibility:
Mark wrote, “Ending bullying is not a thing that can be done by people working in isolation.” Village raising requires a village. So supporting, acting, and loving these kids, let’s give them a life worth living.”
There have been offers of support on Facebook, texts, calls, and even complete strangers have contacted me with their support and many had memories of Autumn or had a story about their own children and their struggles. An emotional video memorial went around the web, featuring Autumn laughing and dancing and growing up in a shower of love.
The story of autumn, though very painful, has a strong message. It is the hope of her parents that no other child will feel alone, and no other family will go through such a heartbreak.
Autumn was not just a victim of bullying. She was a daughter, a sister, a friend – a person who loved baby blue, archery and helping people. Her soul was radiant and her heart was huge.
Her family hopes she will be remembered not only in connection with the manner in which her life ended but because of the love, courage and compassion she demonstrated in her daily life.
Psychologists encourage parents not to be afraid to talk to children (even during childhood). Teach children to report bullying. Note the change of behavior. Above all: listen.
Since sometimes, these are the quietest battles that require our support the most.
The story of Autumn Bushman has moved thousands of people. It is a simple yet effective wish of her family that her life would lead to action and compassion and a world where no child would feel unsafe and unheard.
So let us do something in her memory, stand up, speak out, and help each other like Autumn would have done.