When I got sick, I saw a side of my husband that I wish I had never seen. He left me and our newborn daughter because he couldn’t be the man I thought he was—the partner and father. So I decided to go along with it… In the end, I was stronger, and he learned a lesson he won’t forget.
I’m 30 years old and married to Drew, who is 33. We have a daughter named Sadie who is six months old. She’s everything to me. Her chuckles can make any situation better, her sweet smile lights up every room, and her cute, squishy cheeks? Just magic. But when I got sick, none of that seemed to matter to my spouse.
Allow me to explain. Get ready; it still feels strange to me, and not just because I was sick with a high fever when it all started.
I got a bad virus a little over a month ago. Not COVID, not RSV, but something just as bad. I had terrible chills, constant pain all over my body, a splitting headache, and a cough that made my ribs feel like they were being hit. What’s the worst part? Sadie had just gotten over her sick, and I was quickly running out of energy.
I was utterly worn out from trying to get better while taking care of a newborn who needed constant reassurance. Drew had been acting strange for weeks, even before I got sick. He was distant and often on his phone, laughing at things he wouldn’t tell me about. He would brush it off with a vague, “Just work stuff” when I asked. He was quick to get angry, even over little things like an unwashed dish or forgetting to thaw chicken for dinner.
Drew glanced at me one night as I was rocking Sadie and trying not to cough on her and said, “You always look so tired.”
I said, tired, “Well, yeah.” I’m raising a whole person.
I truly thought that being unwell would wake him up. That watching me have a hard time will finally make him step up. I was completely mistaken.
That night my fever hit 102.4, and I could hardly sit up. My skin hurt, my head hurt, and every part of my body hurt. I went to Drew and implored in a whisper, “Please take Sadie.” I just need to rest for 20 minutes.
What did he say? “I can’t.” I’m having trouble sleeping because of your cough. I need to sleep. I believe I’ll spend a couple nights at my mom’s.
I laughed at first. He must have been joking.
He wasn’t.
He got up, packed a suitcase, kissed Sadie on the forehead (but not me), and left. I kept wondering, “Are you really going to leave me like this?” the whole time. He didn’t say anything; he just nodded and walked away.
He never asked me how I was going to take care of a baby when I could barely stand. I sat on the couch, rocking Sadie while she screamed from being hungry and tired. I stared blankly at the front door.
I texted him, “Are you really going to leave your sick wife and baby alone?”
What did he say? “You’re the mother. You know what you’re talking about. I’d just be in the way. Also, your cough is driving me crazy.
I couldn’t stop shaking my hands as I read it over and over. I couldn’t believe that the man I married could just ignore me like that. Maybe it was the illness or the anger.
Okay.
I made it through the weekend. I can’t recall how. While Sadie was sleeping, I cried in the shower. I kept her safe, warm, and fed with Tylenol, water, and nothing but my willpower. Drew never called. Not even once.
My family was far away, and I couldn’t reach my buddies. I was lying on the floor, cold and alone, and all I could think about was how I would make him know what it’s like to be entirely alone.
So I came up with a strategy.
I knew exactly what I was going to do as my fever dropped and I started to feel like a person again.
I texted a week later and said, “Hey babe.” I’m feeling better now. You can go home.
His answer came quickly: “Thank God.” I haven’t slept here yet. “Mom’s dog snores, and she wants me to do yard work.”
That poor guy.
I cleaned everything, made Sadie’s food, grabbed all of her supplies, and even made his favorite dinner, spaghetti carbonara with garlic bread, before he arrived home. I took a shower, combed my hair, put on makeup, and wore clothes that didn’t say, “I’ve been up all night with a baby.”
He strolled in as if nothing had occurred. He grinned, ate dinner, and then fell asleep on the couch with his phone in his hand.
That’s when I hit.
“Hey,” I said in a pleasant voice. “Can you hold Sadie?” I only need to get something from upstairs.
“Sure,” he murmured, still looking at TikTok.
I went upstairs, got a tiny luggage and my car keys, and came back down.
His gaze went quickly to the suitcase. “What is that?”
“I made a reservation for a spa retreat over the weekend. I need a break from massages, facials, and room service.
He sat up upright. “Wait, you’re leaving now?”
“Yes! Only for two nights. Her favorite toys are ready, the bottles are labeled, and there are plenty of diapers and wipes. “You’ve got this, Dad.”
He began to stammer, “Claire, I don’t know—”
I cut him off. “Do you remember what you said? “You’re the mother.” You know what you need to do. Now you’re the father. “Figure it out.”
Then I went.
No slamming doors. No crying. A calm journey to a nice inn with a spa and cookies that are still warm.
That day, I didn’t answer any calls or SMS. He’d be able to handle it if it was a real emergency.
I got a long massage, took a snooze by the fire, had a manicure, and watched corny reality shows while wearing a soft robe.
On Saturday, I slept in, got a facial, drank coffee, and read a book by the fire.
He called two times. Left two messages on the phone. One was scared, and the other tried to make me feel bad.
“Claire, Sadie won’t go to sleep. She threw up on me. Please call.
I didn’t.
But that night, I finally FaceTimed because I missed Sadie. She looked like a mess but was delighted, chewing on the string of his hoodie. Drew looked like he hadn’t slept since I left.
“I’m sorry, Claire,” he murmured, his voice breaking. I had no idea how hard this would be.
No, he didn’t.
I just nodded. “I know.”
When I got home on Sunday night, there were dishes, bottles, and toys all over the place. Drew looked like a tornado had hit him. Sadie grabbed for me, and I picked her up. She smelled like wipes and trouble, but she was fine.
Drew looked at me like I had come down from the sky.
He said, “I get it now.”
“Do you?” I asked.
He nodded, feeling bad.
I took out a piece of paper that wasn’t divorce papers but a list of chores. A real plan. He had half of the tasks.
I informed him, “You can’t check out anymore.” “I need a partner.” Not another child.”
He nodded. “Okay.” I’m in.
He’s been trying, which is a good thing. He wakes up to feed the baby at night, changes diapers, makes bottles, and even wraps the baby up like a pro.
But I’m not in a hurry to forgive. I see. I’m still thinking about it.
He realized that love doesn’t mean letting someone walk all over you. And I showed him that I’m not the kind of woman you leave when things become hard.
I’m the woman who will always remind you of what she can do.